Like many of our clients, J has an upset family background – though she didn’t go into it until we were having lunch together five days after her session. Coming a month previously to a ‘SHAPE‘ day helped her build trust with us as she watched other people make what often appear to be ‘miraculous’ shifts in their thinking – in front of everyone (with their full permission, of course.)
Our style is to take the mystique out of a client’s coaching and explain as clearly as possible what is going on – one reason that we take two hours on an appointment.I used a technique with J that investigated the hidden intentions of her eating behaviour. To her credit she saw very quickly what was actually going on inside her.
We don’t always get change like this – a woman happily eating with everyone else, and chuckling at her own transformation – in just six minutes, but we did this time! Needless to say, its very rewarding for the coach too.
How ‘J’ went from fear of others’ opinions to eating normally
J’s story follows. Her life has changed fundamentally, she is now able to socialise, go out to restaurants and fully engage with her life from a position of self-control rather than self-doubt. She writes:
"Looking back, there are several situations in my life where things were unbearable, and food was a way I could have control.
I couldnâ€™t pinpoint a cause or exact reason why Iâ€™d binge and then make myself sick â€“ it just became normal behaviour for me.
Iâ€™ve had countless sessions with counsellors over the years, but have never felt anything was really addressed â€“ certainly I made no lasting changes. In fact it made me feel worse about myself because I couldnâ€™t deal with my problem and my life was like an out of control roller-coaster.
I had the opportunity to attended the â€˜SHAPEâ€™ day course on 09/10/10 run by Powerchange. It was an eye opener, offering a completely different way of dealing with life situations. That was followed by a 40minute phone conversation with Roy going through some issues which blew me away and changed more of my thinking and actions.
A month later I attended the Powerchange â€˜Phobia Bustingâ€™ course, finding myself completely open to receiving whatever developed.
But at lunchtime I turned to a friend and said â€˜ I canâ€™t do it, I canâ€™t sit down and eat with loads of people.â€™ I was petrified. She spoke to Andrew who talked with me in the room while the others went off to get lunch. The true reason behind my food issue was brought to the surface – it wasnâ€™t about food itself, it was about what everyone elseâ€™s opinions were of me! We identified a deeply rooted belief that had crippled me for years, then proceeded to join the others for lunch. I sat at the table ate soup and chatted with Andrew and the others, not intimidated by food for the first time I could remember â€“ sorted, and all in 6 minutes!
Nearly two weeks later and I have been out to eat 7 times! I can relax and enjoy a meal with friends without worrying what they are thinking â€“ I am living and eating freely again."
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